Just Asking

Do you think free governments should withhold the truth from its citizens?

Remember the show, X-Files, where so much was made of the secrecy of the government about Area 51? Does Area 51 contain proof of aliens?

Do you believe we know everything the government knows about the Kennedy assassination?

Or how about American Airlines Flight Number 77, which is commonly believed to have crashed into the Pentagon on September 11, 2001. Yet questions remain about the lack of airliner debris, the inability of the hijacker to fly, the conflicting size of the impact point and other questions.

Or dark chocolate ... is it really good for you? And why isn't white chocolate? And why does white chocolate taste like flavored candy wrapper?

I went with my kids to Great America once and we took in a magic show. I've seen magic shows on television and I'm the skeptic. How can the audience be fooled by these 'illusions'? What idiots. What morons.

We got there early and took the best seats to be able to uncover the illusion. We were in the front row, off to one side (so we could see behind). And I settled back with a grin, sure I'd be able to unmask the magic.

The magician came out and announced he was going to saw a young lady in half. I snorted and began to wish I'd gone to the Three D show instead. Meanwhile the magician said, "I'm going to pick out some audience members to help me."

Bah, he was going to pick shills from the crowd. People he planted there to help him.

How surprised was I when he picked ... me.

Yeah, me.

Heh ... he sure made a mistake, picking me. I climbed onto the stage with a manic grin, knowing I'd finally be able to see everything.

He had a young lady get into a coffin like box. Before closing the top, he put a rope around her neck and fed it though a hole at the top of the coffin. He handed the other end of the rope to another guy whom had been picked. The magician asked him to keep a steady, hold on the rope.

Then he did the same with the young lady's ankles, handing this rope to another volunteer.

He closed the box, and then he asked me to open a panel on the side, reach in and touch the girl to confirm she was still there.

Gulp ... married man here.

Anyway, I managed the task without embarrassing the girl or myself, and I closed the panel again.

Without any further delay, the magician slammed a metal blade through notches in the coffin. Then another. Then, quicker than could be believed, he separated the coffin into two pieces ... right in front of me!

Her legs were still poking out one side ... her head from another ... but the two coffin halves were separated by about four feet.

What ... the .... heck !!

I was right there!

It happened right in front of me!

Me, Mr. Skeptic.

Wow.

Anyway, I'm pretty sure the whole thing was recorded, but the government still won't release the tapes.

Norm

(hey, y'all, my new vampire Young Adult book, Fang Face is out! Get your fang now. Come visit me at www.fangface.homestead.com and learn where you can get your own graffiti'd ... er, signed book!)

Classifications of Hats

In my school, there are people who wear hats and there are people who don’t. The Hatwearers and Nonhatwearers intermix in groups of friends, so I know some personally. I myself am a Nonhatwearer, since my hair repels anything more complicated than a ponytail (on good days!) and definitely would not tolerate a hat. (I use this excuse in winter when Mom insists I wear one.)

Of the Hatwearers, I notice a few distinct species. Primarily there are the Baseballhats, the Knitcaps, and the Designertops. I have had time to study these fascinating creatures, and have noticed consistencies amongst the groups.

Hatis baseballus
This group contains the more sporty kids, who like to wear their hats as a slogan of their favorite [insert sport here] team or favorite [insert brand name/organization here]. Mostly made up of males, the kids like to fool around with each other’s hats and occasionally put their own or their friends on backwards to look individual. (This usually doesn’t work as everyone soon does the same thing.)

Hatis knitus
These kids are an assortment of both males and females. The knit caps are usually soft and some shade of brown for the females, and any assortment of colors on the males. These are the hats that come closest to serving the honest purpose of keeping one warm, and they usually go quite well with a scarf. Also, the hat could have been knit by a relative or by oneself.

Hatus designerus
Designertops are like arctic foxes—they have a different look in different seasons. In summer these hats, usually worn by elite members of the social hierarchy that possess enough confidence to sport them, are light and colorful and serve little purpose other than style. In the winter, however, they become fuzzy, flappy devices that are generally worn more indoors than outdoors. This species is mostly made up of the female gender, so squeals of “Omigodyourhatissoooocute!” are not uncommon.

Of course, I fit into none of these classifications. The only times I wear hats are when my parental units force me into one when I venture into the tundra (AKA the sledding hill). And then, of course, there was that fuzzy pink hat I donned at my friend’s bat mitzvah. That was, by far, my favorite.

(The email told me to write something about hats...I gave it my best shot :)

Kieryn
www.kierynnicolas.blogspot.com
www.kierynnicolas.com
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Images from: capitate.co.uk, hyrcollective.com, aucklandsheepskin.com